My Dear Friend Shani- "A Face of Israel"
One week down, five to go- can't believe I will be here in Israel for such a long time. This first week was spent settling into my apartment which is located in Nachalat Binyamin, a pedestrian street right next to Shuk HaCarmel, the open-air market in Tel Aviv.
I've spent some days touring and have seen lots of friends during this first week. Before I came to Israel, I thought I needed a project while I'm here so I decided to revive this blog and share about "My Faces of Israel", tell you a little bit about the people I know here. Everyone I meet has a different story about how they came to be in this small and fearless country. Some came on their own, some with a spouse and children, some were born here, some were born to Israeli parents overseas and came back, etc. etc.
I have permission from everyone I write about to share their story. I didn't interview them for the blog, I'm sharing from conversations I've had through the years. I can't sing or paint, my God given talent is a memory for detail. I'm sharing in the order that I've seen people on this particular trip:
Shani Zadikario is a friend I met on my very first Momentum trip in 2018. We were both Community Leaders (which means we were each in charge of a group of 8-9 women traveling with us on the trip). My women came through Hadassah of New England and hers from all over Israel. A little about Momentum if you aren't familiar....Momentum was created about 15 years ago by Lori Palatnik and a diverse group of women who wanted to bring Jewish moms to Israel to learn about themselves, their community, and Israel. Click this link to learn more. Shani and I have stayed connected since that trip and I always appreciate that she makes the effort to come and see me when I'm here. I arrived on a Friday and she and our mutual friend Ravit Morales (next blog) joined me for brunch in Tel Aviv. When we're together, we talk about our families, our children, Zionism, food, spouses... You name it we cover it. Sometimes in English and sometimes in Hebrew.
You read in my previous blog how much I love Kibbutzim (plural of Kibbutz) and wish I had grown up on one. I love the laid back life, no worry about style, community support in all things from work, to raising children, to having fun and celebrating life. To learn more about the Kibbutz movement and their role in the founding of the State of Israel click here. Shani shared a more challenging story about growing up on a Kibbutz with us on our Momentum trip that stuck with me, and we've talked about it more through the years. Children on kibbutz didn't live with their parents. The whole movement is one of equality which means they shared everything- although each kibbutz was a little bit different. There's a communal dining hall, jobs are considered equal no matter what type of work you do, and if you work off the kibbutz, your salary goes to the kibbutz.
Clothes went to the communal laundry, and you picked what you were wearing each day (including underwear) out of a bin. As a child Shani got a dress as a birthday gift from her dad's parents. She described it as one of the most beautiful things she'd seen and when she brought it back to the children's house, the house mother told her it had to be shared. I choke up thinking about Shani sharing the story because the house mother decided that every girl would have a chance to wear her dress on their birthday or a special day. She was used to sharing everything and hoped that this one thing could be just hers. (I heard a similar story from another friend who was gifted a piano and until the elders decided what to do with it, it sat in her room but she couldn't play it. Once the decision was made, all members had the right to come in her room and use the piano anytime.)
Shani is married to Ofer who grew up in Arad. They have 4 children and live in Raanana. Last year, I brought my American friends to visit with them in their home in Raanana and when Shani shared that she was from Kibbutz Negba, my friend broke out into a song that she knows from camp back in the states. It was a lively fun song and yet Shani had a reaction to it. In 1939 when Negba was founded it was one of the most southern points, and it's where the Egyptians were stopped by Kibbutz members when they attacked from the south. Shani recently explained to me the meaning of the song comes from a verse in the Torah where God encourages the Israelites to spread to all directions in the land of Israel and make their home. For my friend, it was a fun song to sing in the dining hall at camp and feel like a Zionist. For Shani, it was connected to her life and the people in her community that died to protect their country.
This is an interesting dichotomy between how we American Jews see Israel and how Israeli Jews see themselves. It's a conversation that I have with a lot of my friends here and this past week has been full of contemplation on that topic. As I mentioned in a previous blog, I like to think I'm super knowledgeable about Judaism and Israel. In America I'm the one people come to and ask questions about this or that. As I've sat with many different friends during a very tumultuous week here in Israel, my knowledge about "Israeli life" and "geo-politics" and "history of Israel"; topics that directly affect their lives, have no bearing on our conversation. It's more important for me to listen and learn about what they are experiencing right now today. So while I'm "living" here for 6 weeks, I'm not experiencing Israel the same as my friends.
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